Why do THEY always have to win?

[Edwina's Secretary]

We are in total agreement on the concept of "forbid." I never heard my mother ask permission and since reaching the age of independence...neither have I. Just the thought of my husband "forbidding" sends chills down my feminist spine.

Marriage is far, far more difficult than I ever thought it would be (and made more so in my case by my "advanced" age and inherent independence and stubbornness.) The complexities are daunting -- and yet looked so minor when I was "on the other side...."

Of course, if we wanted to get into semantics we could discuss whether someone can be "forced" or "forbidden" at all or whether there is always a choice...oh, on second thought...let's not. Pettalk after all!

[Randi]

Jen, when we first got Fister up here, it was John being pushy about it, but then, I've always loved cats, so deep down I did want him to come up and live with us. My hesitation was mostly because it would make it difficult to travel - and also knowing that we will have to part with him one day - hopefully a long way away!!

[Cataholic]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary
Marriage is far, far more difficult than I ever thought it would be (and made more so in my case by my "advanced" age and inherent independence and stubbornness.) The complexities are daunting -- and yet looked so minor when I was "on the other side...."

ES- I completely respect your experience, and know 'the dark side' always looks different once you are in it...so, I do bow to your wisdom and experience.

And, I suppose splitting hairs with word use is similar to supporting your position with statistics- you can always support your position depending on how you define the word.

[PayItForward]

I have not voted, as I am unsure what to vote.

The person wanting the cat (we are a sucker for a sad story) varied from cat to cat.

Sometimes I have to be the sensible one, sometimes it is Steve.

The only time we had a real standoff (in a friendlyway) was over Milo & Treacle (Nee Sooty).

I wanted to adopt them both, Steve wanted to just take Milo.

But it worked out for the best

[jenluckenbach]

WOW this is an old topic ! hee hee

By theway, isn't it time for #7???

[Former User]

My husband loves pets as much as I do, and we both would love to take more but for the moment, 4 cats is enough, as we don't have enough space for more. So, no problems here with husband not agreeing (I hope that's a word ).

[catland]

Anyone here remember the TV sitcom "Coach"? One time Hayden said to Christine - "I FORBID you go go!" - she imediately gave him the evil eye and said "You WHAT?????"

Coach, in all his brilliance, looked humbly at the ground and says something to the effect of "I'd really appreciate it if you'd seriously reconsider".

Anyway, my husband and I both found that to be hysterical and we'll even say that now and then = "I FORBID you...." because we know that we won't forbid each other to do anything - but we might ask one another to seriously reconsider.


Regarding adopting another pet - Since you are making a commitment that could last for upwards of fifteen or twenty years depending on the pet, then yea, I think its important that both people have agreed to wanting and caring for the animal.

[Amber]

Yup I 100% agree with you. Everytime I want to help a animal out there I always get the response of NO!!! no, no, no!
They never think about it. Always gets their ways!! It aint fair!!
Parents these days!

[cali]

my mom and I were forbidden from getting a guinea pig, now we have 11, he also forbid us from getting a rabbit, he still doesent know

[PayItForward]

Originally posted by jenluckenbach
WOW this is an old topic ! hee hee

By theway, isn't it time for #7???

LOL

No.. The house isn't big enough.

We have two cat trees... If we got another cat, me & Steve would have to move out ?!

[Christiansmommy]

Well, i wanted a dog ever since we got married...5 1/2 years ago and my hubby didnt yet, so being that we both live under the same house and it is a large responsibility to take on, i respected his wishes, if you will, and we agreed upon a cat instead (RB Gabe)..easier to care for, etc. Anyway, i do think that your husband shouldnt FORBID you from getting a pet, but being that you are man and wife and you share a house and a life 50/50, both need to agree, or it wouldnt be right, in my opinion.

5 1/2 years later, we finally got our dog...and it was good timing, we may not have been as up for it, 5 1/2 years ago, as we are today.

Just my 2 cents.

Robyn

[Fuzzy317]

Opposite View-point:

Unless I am gone for a few days, I alone have cat duties: food and litter box cleaning. My fiancee and I agree that our household can't really handle another dog, but I tell her having 5 cats would not be very different from having 4 cats. I have told her that she can get another cat, but she is looking for a special cat.

[Logan]

And you are every woman's dream man, Scott, for having said what you just did!!!!

[kingrattus]

But for Mark & I, it totally isn't that way. Even though he wasn't keen on having any pets at the beginning, he has totally come around and loved each and every one of our critters. And the other thing is, we never have "fights". Persuasive conversations, yes...and that means that we each explain our point of views and come to a mutual conclusion. It usually means that nobody gets "their way", but we find neutral ground that is satisfactory to both.

When Mark & I were going together he definitely told me that in no way did he ever want to have a dog. It took a little while, and now he loves Malone just as much as if it had been his idea to begin with.
===================
Wow Rob & I r like that 90% of the time... But sometimes I have to put my foot down about is gun collecting & sometimes he has to do the same about my animals. If I had my way, I'd have lots more fish & he'd have lots more guns.

But we never fight, maybe argue peafully, but never yell. We have private talks all the time, we talk about whats pissings us off, anoying us, & other stuff like that. Were very civil about stuff. & it doesn't take much to get him to change his mind about most pets, just look at the monster fish & turtle I have.


Rob dislikes dogs quite abit, because of how dissobident they r (his dogs r horribly dissobident, its his parents fault for negelicting there needs), so its taking along time to show rob not all dogs r like that. He loves the fact that Max doesn't bite, doesn't steal food, doesn't beg, snap, snarl, attack other animals, loves to play, but the every now & then woof drives him nutz, his dogs bark at everything & he thinks Max does the same, but he doesn't. But Rob says he likes Max alot better then his 2
yay for Max.

[dukedogsmom]

It's that way with one of my friends at work. I'd boot out the husband and get a dog. She would really like to have one. I just don't understand.