Well, seeing how I am an 'expert' with sick rats, since that's all I'm dealing with, I know Oscar's time is near. I am getting ready to say good bye to my little man. His age is really starting to show. He is almost two years old, since he's a pet store rat with the worst of genes, that's pretty old. He's lost a good amount of weight in the past weeks, he stays on one level of the cage, he lays in the igloo for 23 hours of the day, when he walks his back legs start to give out and he falls down, and now he is starting to ignore food. I have been giving him NutriCal (high calorie paste) lately and he ate that like a vacuum cleaner, I tried giving it to him before and he wanted nothing to do of it. I peeked at him before, he's laying in the corner with his head propped up breathing hard. I know he's getting ready to leave, he told me he's loosing the battle and wants to go, I told him that's ok I understand, and that he has a whole crew up there waiting for him- including his brother.

I'm not ready to loose another child, I just lost two in May, and Fred's (Oscar's brother) was the most horrific death I have ever experienced, I am still not over that. Plus, I have two rats that have tumors and I can't afford the surgery (over $1,000) and I keep debating on whether or not they should have it- the risks associated with the surgery keep telling me "no", but then I don't want to feel like an abusive pet owner and not go through with it. Honestly, I don't think it is worth it, I honestly don't, as cruel as it sounds.

I have so much crap I have to deal with, it is so hard to sit and focus on any one problem. I am so sick and tired of rat ownership, I am sorry, I can't handle it anymore, all I deal with are sick and ill rats, I feel like it's my fault and I'm not caring for them the right way- and that's why they are sick all the time. Every time something good happens, or it looks like none of them are sick, something pops up.

I have owned a total of 11 rats and have raised 4 litters, out of those 11 rats- 2 have never been sick. All the others have had one or more health problems. We have spent over $2,000 on the rats in the past two years.

All I pray for is a quick painless passing for Oscar. I hope he knows how much I love him and how much I will miss him, he's my little boy, my only boy, I love him to pieces. I just wish rats didn't have such a short life span.



I can't handle this anymore.