My neighbor... the sexual offender

[ramanth]

Great house... great deal... quiet neighborhood... friendly neighbor.... who just happens to be on the Sexual Offender List. *sigh*

And has quite a record...
http://www.state.mi.us/mdoc/asp/otis...cNumber=288182


To back up... when my dad and I were looking at the house back in June, Mike was out working in the garden. Dad called over and said hi, and Mike responded in kind, but made no move to come to the fence. Dad asked him how he liked the area and Mike said it was nice and quiet and he had had no problems.

Last Friday, I was outside with my aunt, when Mike walked up to the fence and said hi. He reintroduced himself, but made no move to shake my hand or anything. He asked if I had anyone caring for my lawn and I replied that I would be mowing it eventually but didn't have a mower yet. He told me he mowed the other neighbors lawn for $20 and if that was reasonable. I agreed that it was and he said he'd mow it on Saturday.

Saturday came and after the carpet cleaners left, I hear the mower and Mike was tending the lawn. Afterwards he tapped on the door and then backed away about 6 feet. I gave him $20 and thanked him. He stepped back again and said it was no problem and asked if I would be interested in any vegetables from their garden. He explained that they had way too much for them to eat and said it'd be no charge. I said sure and a short while later he brought over a bag, tapped on the door and left.

An hour after that, the dogs started barking and an elderly gentleman was at my door with a baking dish. He told me, 'Welcome to the neighborhood', and walked off before I could ask his name. (He lives in the same house as Mike.)

It was Sunday when I was on the Family Watchdog site and found my neighbor listed.

I haven't had a chance to work on the house since, but today when I stopped by to check the mail, there was a bag of cherry tomatoes hanging on my porch handrail.

I'm not going to be paranoid or live in fear but I am going to be cautious and on guard.

If it were you, would you say something to the guy right off the bat or not bring it up unless he tried to get overly friendly?

[RICHARD]

Keep your distance and never let your guard down.

--------------

MY gf had moved into an apartment building and we ran into the landlord dude.

She introduced me and the guy never made eye contact and gave me the wimpiest handshake on the planet.

Later on I told her that I didn't trust him at all and there was something strange about him. She poo-poohed me and a few months later she told me that she was stopped by two detectives in the parking lot asking about him-
turns out he was sleeping with a teen that lived one of the units. Sometimes you intuition is way better than you think.

So, be careful and never leave anything to chance.

[Karen]

I would not say anything, but just be cautious, and be polite but not too friendly. If there are neighbors with kids that you get to know, you should make sure they know about his status.

[Puckstop31]

http://michigan.gov/msp/1,1607,7-123...0926--,00.html

Get one. Do not let anyone know you have it. Learn to use it. Use it if you must. If you decide you MUST use it. Use it to kill. Pray/hope/vibe/whatever that you never NEED it.

---

What you describe is my worst fear as a father of a girl.

[caseysmom]

We had one in our neighborhood, I have two teenage daughters...the neighbors put so much pressure on the family they had him move, it was an adult kid.

If your not comfortable with a gun (which I have no problem with, I had one once and learned how to use it) but if your not comfortable you can get pepper spray.

[ramanth]

I'm comfortable around guns. Grandpa was a police officer and hunter, my parents hunted. I've fired rifles and pistols at ranges.

I'm just not sure if I'd have the wits to take another life and I have the fear the gun could be taken from me by force and used against me.

Ever since I started house hunting, I knew I'd be living alone and so I've been reading several self defense books. Someone tries to start something with me, I'm not going down without a fight.

[Catherinedana]

I suggest that you take any precautions that you would take NO MATTER WHERE YOU LIVED as any sensible person would. I, personally, would not mention it. Just don't get too close and even though he has made friendly overtures, you can be friendly back without encouraging his constant attention. He may actually be trying to do the right thing but your vigilance in taking care of yourself will not allow something bad to happen with this man or anyone else. It looks to me like he may have a substance issue that governs his actions. I would imagine that his sexual offense is sex with a minor from what the record says. He's on parol so if you see anything that worries you or if he's walking around drunk or high, report it. . .they'll put him away again.

Just be careful. . .but then again ALWAYS be careful
Cathy

[pomtzu]

Just be on guard, and don't let him get too friendly. I wouldn't let him know that you know his background unless he is anything toward you, other than neighborly. It appears he is already keeping his distance tho if he didn't offer a handshake and backed away from you too. One good thing - he hasn't had any "known" offenses in 3 years, so maybe there is hope for him in spite of his rather lengthy record.

[shais_mom]

I'm kind of along the lines of everyone else. No I certainly wouldn't move either!! And at this stage of the game are they really going to cut you a check b/c your property value might be lowered? umm Probably not!
Just keep on your guard, and be cautious. Keep the back door locked that the dogs use, and make sure your dad checks your window locks. Don't underestimate the power of the your dogs either. You know and I know they are uber friendly but HE doesn't know that. And you never know what they will do if you are threatened. I've always said that Keegan would open the door for them and keep it open wagging her tail all the way if it ever came up but now I'm not so sure. She is very protective of her area and home and my parents home. My dad's cousin was walking into their house one day and Dad was right behind him and Keegan met him at the door with her teeth bared and growling and snapping. Until my dad yelled "KEEGAN" and she realized he was with him, then she snapped out of it and started wagging her tail and wiggle butting around. When I was coming home from CA in 2006, my parents shed got broken into, and I think a lot more would have happened, if Keegan wouldn't have been there.
Several years ago when I had Shaianne who wouldn't hurt a fly, I was walking her down the sidewalk. I came upon 3-4 Hispanic men walking down the street. Now, I normally have a bit of anxiety when meeting ANY group of people on the street (middle of the day or whenever, especially men regardless of race) but I just kept walking Shaianne, and those men went single file by me, and kept their heads down and never even looked sideways in my direction. I don't know if its b/c she looked like a doberman, or was just an intimidating dog (she was a big greyhound) or simply b/c in this podunk town, God only knows what would happen if they were "caught", looking at a young woman by any of the local rednecks! Next time you are near your local truck stop, pick up a tire thumper,(similar to this http://www.medropship.com/images/07PETT1.jpg) keep one in your car and/or under your pillow/by your bed. I keep one in my car that's all decked out in the CHIEF REDMAN attire, ready for action. I need to get one for my house b/c God only knows what would happen if I got a gun!

That said, missy, when's the PT meeting gonna be at your house?! That'll scare ANY sexual offender away!

[Queen of Poop]

Don't just read about self defence. See if you can find a women's self defence class. I did. It was fantastically empowering!!

I am surprised no one has mentioned this before, but maybe another dog? A bigger dog?

Be on your guard, keep your doors locked but don't be afraid in your own home. Take precautions but enjoy your new life. He seems to be setting a boundary for himself and not getting real close to you during your encounters. Ensure that is maintained, don't let him come any closer. You'll learn how to do that in the self defence class. What was truly funny in my class was a 60 year old woman was able to use just her voice to keep the "padded attacker" at bay, he couldn't get near her to grab her. She was hugely powerful just using her voice.

[shais_mom]

I am surprised no one has mentioned this before, but maybe another dog? A bigger dog?

it might not have been mentioned here - but it was when she posted this to facebook. She already has two dogs, both are good sized, yet skinny. Being a young, newly singleton, one income home-owner, a 3rd dog might not be in the financial cards, tho I'm sure Kimmie would love it! lol

[ramanth]

That said, missy, when's the PT meeting gonna be at your house?! That'll scare ANY sexual offender away!

LOL!!!

In the past Kia has growled at two men (strangers). But she also tucked tail and ran when my dad jumped out from behind a tree at a friend and I in the middle of the night. So I guess it'd be 50/50 with her.

I'd actually be more worried that someone would seriously hurt them if they did interfere.

Thanks again for all the feedback everyone.

I'm not going to quote everything, I'll just touch on some points.

I'm not out to make this guy's life a living hell. Frankly, he did that himself with the choices he made.

According to him, he's lived there 9 months (which I'm sure is the truth as it coincides with his parole date). Kids have been playing in the street and riding their bikes. As far as I can tell everyone on the block gets along and things do seem calm. The last thing I want to do is get on this guys bad side and stir a hornets nest.

I'm not sure what other neighbor he mows the lawn for. I'm not sure of the radius on his GPS ankle bracelet. He can obviously come onto my entire property without it going off.

I do not want to confront him unnecessarily. If he continues to keep to himself, all the better for me. But if he tries to cross a line, I'll let him know in no uncertain terms am I interested and that I'd like to be left alone.

As for the house, I'm locked in. It's a contract with the government (HUD). I must live in the house for one year. Can't be rented out. Can't be sold. After a year, I can do whatever I want with the house.

I'm not going to let him force me to move anyway. I like the house and I like the area.

He knows I have the dogs, but I never told him they were friendly. They look and act friendly, but he has no idea if they've been trained to attack. I'll keep it that way. And Staci is right, a third dog just isn't in the cards right now.

I plan on getting ahold of the parole officer and introducing myself and explaining how I've moved in and if there is anything I should be on watch for.

I'll look into self defense classes in the area. Many friends and my grandma recommended ADT so I'll give them a call as well and get an estimate.

[captain]

Kim,
Do a self defence class - I have been practising Martial Arts for over 25 years, and it becomes second nature - which is what you want.

I think if you keep your distance, and he is keeping his, things will work both ways.

AND

If you do have a PT gathering, invite Gini (and she can invite all the firemen she knows!!!) and Phred (who can do the same)

Hehehehehe

Take care
M

[caseysmom]

Just remember you pass these kind of people all the time and don't know it, one should always be aware and careful. It is creepy living next to him but hopefully he wouldn't want to risk his parole.

Tell him you have a boyfriend if it comes up and he lives there but he works odd hours or something, then he won't know when he is there.

[shais_mom]

if you do have a pt gathering, invite gini (and she can invite all the firemen she knows!!!) and phred (who can do the same)

hehehehehe

take care
m

i'm there!